cant wash it all away

yaw yawww!

i remembered when i said to myself that i want to stop working with my aunt by the end of Feb. soooo its the end of February alreadyy!! andd i want to stop workin' already!! but, mom, she just dont want me to quit. she want me to work. she wants to be happy. happy using my money. seriously, she just said that today..

tolong la ibu. fara tanak keje lg dah. tanak sara kluarga. i mean, bukan tanak selamanya, tp just for now. kerja ngan mama kat klia just nk hilang rse bosan n nk dpt duit cket utk cuti yg gila bapak pnjang ni. skang rse nye duit yg ade cukup2 jela nk tmpung mse cuti ni. please dont beg me to work again. pleasee!! *as if u can read this..

i'm currently on sensitive mode. seyesly. anything yg bleh skit kn ati cket or bwt hati terguris mmg akan dipendam selama nya. ewahh haha. tp btol. dont play2 with me at this moment. i just dont feel welcome anymore in this house. a week at my aunt's house so i thought people in my house would missed me when i'm gone. but i figured they didn't even care a bit. lg menghalau balik kerja n duduk umah mama lg ade la. dorang tau tak ape prasaan duduk sane?? TAK! sane bosan tho ade tenet n tv. tenet slow. tv bosan. i have nobody to talk to damn it!

my aunt and uncle are just so weird. they dont communicate alot. they didn't talk much in the car, at home, at dinner. do you know how i feel?! i feel like a burden to them! and i dont know what is the fuckin' prob with my uncle. he's a jerk. seriously.. he never smile back when i smile at him. he takes everything i said or do seriously even when i was joking. bullshit i tell ya BULLSHIT!

now that i'm home, mom begs me to work! she said she dont have money and wont be able to give me pocket money. hellooooo??!!! i dont even ask you for that! i have my own little money that i'd saved. sorry i'm not your perfect child. i stabbed u behind ur back. but somehow, u got to change yourself first before u can change others mom. Sorry again i siad horrible things about u.. but my heart just cant hold it any longer. i have nobody to talk to rite now. everybody seems busy and this is what i did when theres nobody to talk to - writing.. on papers and blog





~~~yaw!